This is the funniest thing I’ve seen about the whole Musk Twitter Event because imagine being so bad that John Green, the man who was famously run off Tumblr by literal maniacs editing his post to a serenade to cocks in the Green Cock Incident, considers Twitter to be The Worst Site, ie worse than Tumblr. Insane
My boyfriend keeps looking at me like 😐... 🥚 when I tell a story that happened pre-transition and it gets funnier every time, so I present to you, in no particular order,
egg shit that SOMEHOW did not tip me off:
- Played in numerous d&d campaigns in college; didn't play a lady character even once.
- Invented a male persona so I could sub in when my boyfriend's frat was a man short for Beer Olympics.
- Maintained that male persona and later pledged the frat.
- Was regularly the only girl invited to Boys' Night because "you're a guy like at least 40% of the time anyway".
- Planned elaborate costumes every halloween; never once went as a lady or anything lady-adjacent.
- Actually won 'Sexiest costume (male)' at a theatre event.
- Regularly auditioned for male roles in theatre productions. Landed a small part in an all-female production of As You Like It as Silvius and was never more psyched to be in a play.
- Watched Ouran High School Host Club straight through by myself; felt weird and immediately chopped off all my hair about it.
- Messed around with my college boyfriend while in boymode, using masc pronouns and an assumed name.
- 80% of my wardrobe in college was hand-me-downs from that same boyfriend.
- Went as a wizard for halloween multiple times as a kid, with the beard and everything; never once considered being a witch.
- Invented a male persona in middle/high school just for going to hockey games with my uncle.
- Made out with more than one gay dude who said "I don't know what it is about you, I'm usually never attracted to women."
- Ended up effectively living in my buddy Jake's dorm room every single year, no matter what my official living arrangements were.
- Started wearing Old Spice in high school because a boy I liked wore it and I liked how he smelled. Pulled the same move in college with a particular brand of shampoo.
- Wore the men's jeans+high-impact sports bra combo in an astounding number of photos.
And I didn't know! My oblivious ass sat there in my boyfriend's old pants with my titties tied down, calling myself Jack, playing a male illusionist for the 76th time in a d&d game with my frat brothers and making plans to go to Boys' Night afterwards for Streetfighter and beer, and I didn't figure it out.
Mob boss who gets equally passionate about rewarding loyalty as punishing betrayal. What?! Johnny Backstabs killed two of my rivals and saved my daughter from assassins?! Incredible!! I want him loved! I want him wifed! I want his bills paid! I want his rent gone! I want his dog pet! I want his gender trans’d! I want her car fixed! I want flowers on her doorstep! Get this DONE!!😡🥰😡
Love this, but reblogging it specifically for “Get rid of secret rules.” That’s one of the most amazing illustrations—and points—I’ve ever seen.
so important especially for perfectionists who procrastinate and never finish, or even start because they set such high standards for themselves.














